you son of a gun ;)

His place on friday and spent the night. he was going back to his hometown for awhile, i guess he miss me? hehehe :3 so suddenly we had a looonnngggg talk. well not so long, but heart to heart about our exs' and things idk, things he dunno. so we spilled.

at that one point i broke down cuz he said when we were together for the first 6 months, he still have feelings for her and it was stronger than he was with me. broke down crying, it really hurts. after that he just reassured me, comfort me and hug me. telling me it was already the past, i asked him if he saw her now would he have any feelings towards her? honestly. he said no. relieved? maybe, im not even sure. now whenever he goes back to his hometown i feel insecure again.

i don't like her and never will. after crying and talking we settled down. then hunger strikes the both of us. so we cooked for ourselves. i love it if we cook together :3 we cooked fried chicken and i ate with my hands for the 1st time! :3 cepat kenyang oh! if my nails weren't that long i would enjoy it fully! love love spending time with him so so sooo much.

iloveyoujerk ;3

Causing arguements

Noticed too that after the camera we've been arguing a few times already, and mostly im the cause of it i started it. maybe im just not satisfied with not getting what i want while he does, jealous i think. buh! what for i get jealous je! bodoh! convinced myself not everyone gets what they want, everyone works hard to get what they want. i guess i need to work harder, wait and see.

hoping he would give me that something i want most for my upcoming bday but its so fcking impossible haha. and also that want of mine from my parents, fcking impossible hahahaha. well, i guess i have to work my way up to those stuff then :) i have to dream on and get that this is fcking reality, NOT EVERYONE GETS WHAT THEY WANT. as much as i love him, sometimes im just jealous and envy it hurts.

oh! gonna get my braces tighten 3 days b4 me bday too, nice bday present. i guess i only update to pour my feelings out once in a while other than twitter. well, released.

meow xoxo

Its been awhile

Haven't been touching this blog for awhile now, malas bha. haha so will only update like once in a while. so, whats been going on lately is pretty normal. Midterm is coming up and postponed the hotel thing to monday, that time pun mcm no mood everyone and one of us didn't come. hopefully monday will do it cuz can't delay anymore, midterms and trips are delaying it and makes it very hard to do this shit ass presentation in time.

these few weekends will be busy with trips, next saturday Pulau Manukan with Bainon, Sam, Sabby and love CAN'T WAIT!! 1st time go pulau and with awesome friends! :3 the following week will have college trip to kundasang, FINALLY! at least for once we have a trip in this one time college life with classmates and good friends, hopefully everyone can go! :3

so love went back to ranau for his grandpa's bday today. won't be seeing him till..dunno when haha we might be busy cuz of college.

so today went to tg aru with some friends for Student Council activity to bond with the others, tiring cuz barely ate and was playing some games too intense. i ate flour btw haha! it was fun though, got back around 1 and bathed Bobo with dad was so freakin tired didn't consume much food went to take a nap immediately after bathing him. He wooke me up with his call, nasib la haha if not i can sleep through the night.

so tomorrow will be another lazy sunday at home, should i go cp and have dinner with Vun? yeeeeee need to make up my mind i don't have his number lg tu ==

so i guess thats it? more updates later on :)

6th Feb

Today, went out in the afternoon for lunch at Seven Seas Restaurant. a new one somewhere at sri kepayan. food is awesome! it was the grand opening so went there for the food haha. went to cut my hair after that, finally a lil lighter. hair was beginning to be unruly and messy!

after that watch How I Met Your Mother till we go to Hui's place for Chap Goh Mei dinner with her familia :D got to see ze pups!!! SO ADORABLEEEEEE!! GAWD i couldn't stop smiling :D got my last angpau for cny.

So Bainon plans we all go pulau on the 25th, decided to bring him along it'll be funn!! can't wait! and also gonna have trip for school but need to really2 save cash. gaji is cmg soon hopefully its enough! :/ pray pray it jadi and enough! ngeeh